Charles & I both went through divorces that we did not want or desire. We understood the value of family and we didn’t want our families to be broken, so we fought for those marriages. That was not the right reason to delay the divorces. God believes in marriage but if He isn’t in them, I believe He will release you from the marriage. Especially, if He wasn’t the creator of it.
We now look at our marriage in a different light. God placed us together. We know without a shadow of a doubt, that God made us for each other. We were just both living in our own will and not paying attention to the Lord, when it came to the relationships in our lives before June 25, 2016. Having gone to high school together, on that day, we remet. The two of us were on our individual walks with the Lord at the time. We were getting to know who we were with Christ as our Lord & Savior.
Charles had written down what he wanted in a wife & I had prayed for my husband. To be completely transparent, I started out praying for my ex-husband. I was confused into thinking restoration was the answer. When Jesus started showing me who I was in Him, I started learning my worth & value. Due to the past hurts that I had experienced, I didn’t know my value or my worth. The Father made it crystal clear, that going backward was not in His plan for my life. I actually saw Charles standing in front of me in a dream once but I didn’t remember him from school at the time. Who would have believed, God showed me my husband in a dream?
Once I accepted that there was no going back, I started praying for God’s will to take place in my life. I started praying to be a living testimony for Jesus Christ. Boy, did He make that happen and happen fast. Once Charles and I started talking on June 25th, we haven’t stopped talking to one another. We were married on October 6, 2016. Some may say it was quick but we say it wasn’t because it was in God’s timing not out own.
Since that day, we have stated, this marriage is our forever marriage. Our church believes in marriages, strong marriages. We have attended pre-married life, marriage conferences, and classes at our church. During one of the conferences, it was said that for couples to maintain a good marriage, the first thing that needed to happen was to take divorce off the table. We agreed that neither one of us wanted to think about divorce again. So, we took it off the table. Since it isn’t an option in our marriage, it has made life a little harder. We actually have to work in this marriage. There is no easy way out for us!
We made a deal with each other that we would invest in our marriage. Our church has Married Life ministry, it is a ministry dedicated to marriage. The leaders are couples that are married with Jesus as the foundation & third strand in their covenant. They are not perfect but you know that upfront and it actually is nice to see real marriages work out real issues. We attend classes every year. This year we are actually taking a 2nd class. We also pray and read the Bible & devotionals together. Sometimes we slack when it comes to praying & reading but we eventually get our act together and do what we have to do to keep our marriage thriving not dying.
Working on our marriage is actually helping us stay in love. We are learning how to communicate in a healthy way. We still argue but we are able to recognize what we are doing wrong, figure out how to make things right and try our best not to let it happen again. Charles & I try our best not to allow any discussion or argument to be carried over to the next day. Our love grows when it isn’t torn down by nasty names and hateful words. We are not perfect but we are working on correcting what is wrong in our union. We have promised to continue to invest in our marriage for the rest of our lives.
DIVORCE IS OFF THE TABLE!!!